Losing a pet, especially a beloved soulmate pet that has been by someone’s side for many years, can unravel their entire world.

Pets are wholly involved in our routines, our quiet moments, our losses, our wins, and the parts of us we don’t share with anyone else. So when someone you care about is grieving the loss of their beloved pet, you may struggle to find the words that express your sympathy.

And honestly? That’s okay. Because sometimes the best support doesn’t come from words at all. Simply your presence is enough.

You don’t have to fix anything, or cheer them up, or offer advice. Bearing witness to their pain and not judging them for the depth of their emotions is what grieving pet parents need most.

But if you’re still looking for some gentle words of encouragement, or just something to show your support, here is a list of what to say to let them know you’re there for them. And they are not alone in this.

💬 What to Say

Pro tip: Don’t be afraid to say their pet’s name. It won’t make things worse—it shows you see their grief as real.

1. “I’m SO sorry to hear about the loss of {pet’s name}.”

Treat pet loss like any other kind of loss. Letting them know you’re sorry to hear about it might seem basic, but it shows you’re validating their pain.

2. “You gave {pet’s name} the best damn life imaginable.”

Someone said this to me after Squiggles died, and it was one of the most memorable and heartfelt comments. I appreciated it so much.

3. “I’ll never forget the time {pet’s name}…”

If you have specific memories you shared with that person’s pet, let them know! It shows how important their pet was not just to them, but to others, and helps keep their spirit alive.

4. “I understand.”

Validate whatever they’re feeling without trying to fix it.

5. “{Pet’s name} was so {positive description}. They’ll be deeply missed.”

Share some positive things you noticed about their pet… were they beautiful? Friendly? Hilarious? Loving? Cute? Comforting? Precious? The list goes on.

6. “My favorite thing about {Pet’s name} was…”

If there was something about their pet that you truly loved, like how soft their fur was or how calm you felt when they were around, share it.

7. Don’t say anything. Just listen.

Hold the person’s hand. Let them talk. Let there be silence. Simply being there is often the greatest gift of all.

🚫 What Not to Say

Even well-meaning comments can unintentionally hurt. Here are some to avoid—and why:

1. “They’re in a better place.”

Maybe, but right now their person just wants them here.

Instead, try: “They were so loved.”

2. “At least it was just a pet.”

It wasn’t just a pet. It was family. Saying this can feel deeply invalidating.

Instead, try, “Pets are family.”

3. “When are you going to get another one?”

This can land as if their pet was replaceable. Everyone grieves differently, and there’s no timeline.

Instead, try: “{Pet’s name} was one-of-a-kind.”

4. “I know exactly how you feel.”

Although you might be able to relate, it can help to keep the attention on them.

Instead, try, “Tell me, what have your days been like since they died?”

5. “Everything happens for a reason.”

Even if you believe this, most grieving hearts need presence more than perspective.

Instead, try: “Losing a pet just sucks.”

6. “They lived a long, happy life.”

True, but love isn’t measured in years. Loss still hurts, even after a long, beautiful life.

Instead, try: “No amount of time is ever enough.”

The bottom line: You don’t need perfect words.

If you show up with tenderness, presence, and a willingness to let their grief be as deep as their love, that’s enough.

If someone said something that helped you when your pet passed, I’d love to hear it.
👇 Share it below. Your words could help someone else offer real comfort when it matters most.